Monday, May 30, 2016

oh that's just my haemorrhoids, everyone who's 56 has them

Can I please point the fuck out that the 2008 Democratic POTUS campaign was FAR more bitter and divisive than 2016 and if Hillary Clinton loses to Trump in November the fault is she's motherfucking Hillary Clinton.

Certainly. You can point out all kinds of things that suggest in 2008 and 2012 you were not banging drums for Donkeys and heaping disdain on Elephants as truest culprits on the cause of your life's anxieties.

Why not remake history? You have the opportunity, seize it!

Be the fucking flea, Jeffrey!

BE THE FUCKING FLEA!


-- Harold Caidagh, who wonders when Chalupa's bunghole will go beyond surface capillary haemorrhage, and begin bleeding profusely, thanks to that French bulldog named Binny who has been humping the Chalupa bunghole for 40 years. Chalupa must have a lifetime supply of K-Y and Astroglide, more than Gaylord Perry even.

17 comments:

Paul Behrer said...

"point the fuck out"

"motherfucking"

That's how a chihuahua manages to convince itself it's a Mastiff rather than a feline analog among the canines.

Paul Behrer said...

French bulldog named Binny who has been humping the Chalupa bunghole for 40 years

Hal, this is where my Comedy Shop idea comes in handy:

No split, Shylock

I'm sure you've seen copulating dogs that get stuck and hobble around as a 6-legged, 2-headed beast.

Harold Caidagh said...

Notice how the bulldog has powerful jaws, and still it doesn't chomp down on Chalupa's neck and shake the pumpkin-sized noggin of the bulldog until the terminal spinal cord snap and chihuahua death.

Instead, the bulldog just humps and humps and humps. More enjoyment that way, long-term.

I'd be forced to wonder just how much Chalupa likes this routine. Binny's still stuck inside Chalupa's bunghole, Chalupa just shouts FUCK and MOTHERFUCK while letting the stuckness continue.

Chalupa, Lord Garth of the internet's Elba II said...

I WIN YOU FUCKWIT REACTIONARY. I ALWAYS WIN. I'VE BEEN WINNING SINCE 1975.

Karl Franz Ochstradt said...

Hey, in MoCo public schools in the 1970s and late 60s, on how many Christian holidays did students have no school, versus how many Jewish ones?

During that same time, who learned about the Irish "potato famine" or the holodomor from a teacher in the MoCo PS system at the same time, or roughly so, as discussions of The Holocaust and its horrific effect upon humanity?

PUBLIC SCHOOLS IN MONTGOMERY COUNTY MD ARE THE FINEST IN THE LAND! HEAR THAT, HARVARD ADMISSIONS FUNCTIONARY?

Paul Behrer said...

During that same time in those same schools, how many learned about the importance of Hannukah, while hearing no discussions of the background behind the Christmas mythology followed by Christians?

Who learned about the importance of Passover, while silence was offered regarding Easter's origins?

Raise your hands, people. If you dare.

Chalupa, Lord Garth of the internet's Elba II said...

CHRISTIANS ARE TAKING OVER THE GOVERNMENT! I HEARD IT FROM RELIABLE SOURCES!

Karl Franz Ochstradt said...

Why should a MoCoPS teacher be obliged to work on a High Holy Day, though? She or he already has done yeoman's work informing the little tykes on the importance of Rosh Hashanah, Passover, Hannukah, Yom Kippur. Give him/her a day off for temple.

Paul Behrer said...

How about the 6 Days War? Who learned more about that than about the Troubles?

Chalupa, Lord Garth of the internet's Elba II said...

Nobody cares about the plight of the coarse dirt-eaters who made/make up the Shanty Irish.

EVERYONE cares about the Holocaust.

Harold Caidagh said...

Faith 'n' begorrah. Chalupa sounds a lot like Michael J. Smith there.

Paul Behrer said...

Christian child takes day off school for church-oriented activity: ABSENCE RECORDED and demerits accrue.

Jewish child takes day off school for temple-oriented activity: WELL DONE! That's no absence, that's what all the kids should be doing!

Harold Caidagh said...

You can see where and how the MCPS School Holidays got arranged, eh Pablo?

Chet Redweld said...

I take it you lads heard or read more disdain heapings upon Christians, Crackers, etc over the past few days. Would that be a fair summary of things?

Paul Behrer said...

about the Troubles

Read the quickie, peed on ya! entry for this subject. Takeaway:

1) Irish people are psychotic
2) Because of Roman Catholicism
3) and a failure to yield to the UK's iron claw
4) so they used TERRORISM
5) in a manner unlike Israelis
6) proving Judaism SUPREME Christianity EVIL

Harold Caidagh said...

Jimmy Wales makes millions from selling Bullshit Hagiographic Website.

Good job, Jimmy.

Paul Behrer said...

If I believed in reincarnation, I'd want to be a Jew in my next life, so I could learn about anxiety, paranoia, and blameshifting passive-aggression tactics first-hand. The bonus would be that I'd be a published author of fiction and non-fiction, a writer of movie scripts, an actor, an entertainer, a record promoter or record company owner, a banker, a seller of financial products, or a chiropractor. The options, I'd just revel in them.

Look, man, the ONLY value is MONEY and if you can't manage that one, SOCIAL PROFILE is the next best thing.

Integrity, honesty, fidelity to facts -- that shit's for chumps.

Make a buck however you can, but complain that society's going to shit and it seems like everyone's just extremely selfish. Don't even think about connecting the two things!