Tuesday, January 12, 2016

just bring it back and call it new



So, it's like that song above.

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In Model Year 2015 (which actually began in 2014 calendar year) MTB riders were told by faithfully regurgitating MTB media personnel they needed to heed a brand new direction, a spanking shining technological development that would be a game-changer, sure to progress the sport. Those not heeding the direction were certain to be left cruelly behind, dinosaurs from a long-gone era when most humans still lived in caves, bludgeoned each other with rocks and sticks and animal bones, and spent most of their days trying to stay warm, not starve, and not be killed by marauders.

It was up to you, intrepid vanguard of the MTB community, to help cement this change of game.

You were to get wider rims.

This would ensure that when chatting at the trailhead, fueling up in the espresso cafe, sipping a small-batch artisanal vodka at the distillery, pestering your "friends" who own/work at the local bike shop, or most of all when projecting your celebrity self on the internet, you could claim partial responsibility for being involved in this game-changing movement that is progressing the sport and growing it in unforeseen ways.

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It would probably be a good idea now for you to review the history of the sport of MTB.  You might discover that in the long 3 year history of your involvement with buying, taking home, digitally photographing in strategically-arranged couch-leaning** situation, and "sharing" your "experiences" regarding this triangulated, relatively-uninvolved attachment you have to your MTB on the internet, there were actually people riding MTBs before you ever saw one and decided to buy one yourself.

It probably doesn't matter to you what was going on in the late 1990s or early 2000s with MTBs.  In your fantasy world, everything's always progressing thanks to game-changing technology.  It's just physics!

So naturally, what was sold as game-changing 10, 15 or 20 years ago in MTB would not have any precedential value when assessing the brand-spankin'-new GAME-CHANGER technological development sure to progress the sport as of 2015 or, as it now stands, 2016.

As I was saying -- this never happened before.  Nobody ever sold gigantic tires on gigantic rims before in the history of MTB.

Nobody who theoretically could have tried such rims & wheels hypothetically might have found them enjoyable or even tolerable to pedal for any time over 15 mins (on average).

Unless flat or downhill.

But it's gonna change your game!


--Paul Behrer, whose view of long-term is a bit lengthier than a 15 minutes from now prognostication.


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** Alternatively, and perhaps far superior, is the garage shot of MTB adjacent to 2-3 KTM motorcycles, a Porsche Boxster, and a Range Rover.

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