Thursday, December 31, 2015

president of fan club = same thing as investigative journalist

Apparently Nick Gillespie = Glenn Greenwald = Tarzie.

Yes, NSA is changing policies "because of Edward Snowden." 

Right.

If you're Nick=Tarzie=Glenn, just allege the causal connection.  Why prove it when you're busy building and selling a theme for eedjit mindless tribalist consumption?  And besides, proof is for courtrooms and even there we all know that Jack Nicholson spoke the plain simple veracity-laden explanation for why courtroom proof never really seeks the truth.

But then again, Jack's a known womanizer, hence misogynist purveyor of the cis-het-pat-riarchy.  So maybe he's really just an actor, unlike Matt Damon or Jon Stewart or Stephen Colbert or Bill Maher.

Take a few minutes here to fry your brain while you sort out where the line(s) is(are) drawn between & among the categories of news reader, actor, and "political talk show host" or "political satirist".

*******************

Is Nick Gillespie really so stupid as to believe Glenn Greenwald and the "Edward Snowden" fable?  Is he trying to make himself into the Aesop of the 21st Century?

Or does Nick maybe not give two shits about the truth, neither cynically and ironically pursuant to the Nicholson video linked above, nor as a value to hold in mind generally, where his journalistic enterprise is concerned?

What makes the Silent T any different from the Washington Post or New York Times on this absurd fairy tale?

And once again, why is arch whistleblower and destroyer and wide-open-blower of national security secrets "Edward Snowden" still alive if his big revelations were so game-changing?  And where are the documents he snuck out to Greenwald for pre-disclosure review?  They're not even dripping out, let alone being released in that much-feared "dump" like a giant earth-mover load from something like a Terex Titan.

I guess Tarzie can fill you in on that, if Nick and Glenn won't.


-- Harold Caidagh, still thumbing nose in direction of GRH, SJWs, and all others who think he should keep his thoughts to himself.


Saturday, December 26, 2015

the yuck, the yuckle, the buckling yuckling suckle

Maybe this wouldn't be an issue for you if you didn't have that absurd tribal need to identify as "a Jew". Maybe the identity as "a Jew" carries too much Spiritual Exclusivity and Existential Supremacy baggage. All that Chosen shit. 'n' shit.

Perhaps you should keep your god-damned magical thinking (hey thanks, Crowbar!) to yourself. Honestly, I don't care if you want to worship a 6 pointed star and call yourself Chosen and sequester yourself with opposition to the goyim and their ways of treyfness.

I don't really mind if you want to remove leavening for Passover, to guilt the shit out of yourself while you make "jokes" about Catholic goyim and their guilt issues.

What did the ancient Jewish people do to deserve this self-flagellation of guilt mixed with arrogant Chosen-ness?

More importantly, why would someone choose to make him/herself into something so many people find distasteful, socially speaking?

Because the rabbi cut some skin off your dick?

Because your parents did the song-and-dance of guilt-with-superiority?

And why are you so quick to heap scorn and hatred on the Christians?

And why are you so greedy?

And so eager to make a quick profit regardless of long-term social destruction qualities advanced in the monetary gain?

And so eager to run confidence scams on others while pretending you're doing it for social or technological progress that benefits all of humanity?

These are the questions I'd like to see someone ask, as a stand-up routine.

But the poor soul would be terminated before the act was over.

Or cut completely out of the "scene" or whatever the rent-seekers call the enterprise of selling stand-up performance done by others.

It's considered healthy to make fun of rednecks.  Of Christians.  Or of Southerners.  Or, especially in this 2d decade of the 21st C, it's rather chipper and very vigorous, health-wise, to make fun of heterosexuals.

I can't see how any of this ties together though.


-- H.M. Lohmann, comfortably acknowledging his spiritual and existential naivety.

Wednesday, December 23, 2015

derailed in your teens, never saw the enemy



Possibly a rerun. The editorial staff can't recall if posted before. Added today mostly for the Danny Thompson bass work, but the lyrics and RT guitar don't exactly suck for the opening warmup song on the tour's stops. Available from RT's site on Beewswing, as a whole show recorded during The Old Kit Bag tour, called Ducknapped!

RT warms up nicely on the next song, Pearly Jim. If you just let YouTube roll through, you'll get that next. And then Outside of the Inside, which the editorial staff definitely has posted before.

Don't bug me or anyone else here with commentary on his Californicating and softer Steely Dan-esque production, it's not about that.


--Karl Franz Ochstradt, fan of melancholy guitarists everywhere

Monday, December 21, 2015

nolan =/= soderbergh

Maybe it was the way the air-stuffed Wonder Bread quality of Inception won such excited puffery from the experts, maybe the ego already was on its asymptotic trajectory, but either way, Christopher Nolan seems convinced he has the atmospheric and other hard-to-quantify chops of a Stephen Soderbergh.

Why else would he try to top Soderbergh's interpretation of Solaris?

The thing that makes Soderbergh's Solaris so good is that it doesn't ape-but-modernize when using the same source novel as Tarkovsky.  It sets up the psychologically tense, wrong-footing-at-every-turn landscape a little better than Tarkovsky's version.  Tarkovsky's version is Tarkovsky:  see The Sacrifice.

Nolan seems to be trying for meld-aping both Solyaris and The Sacrifice while modernizing the mix.  A tiny thumbnail version of The Sacrifice, and the something-like-style of Solyaris.  But again -- modernized.  Thus the wicked coolness of the visuals while moving through the wormhole, or the Iceland-located barrenness that served as Mann's planet.

While watching Interstellar I thought of grabbing my .mp3 player and using its dictation-recording ability.  There were so many scientific SNAFUs that should not have escaped the attention of the Greatest Science Minds on Earth, I was MST3King the show.  But to no real audience.

Just for one big clusterfuggle:  why would they think two planets sitting next to a black hole would have stable environments?  And stable for a long time?  Not prone to being affected by the wicked anomalous stuff going on right next door?

They land on each and are surprised that each is barren.  "But the reports were so positive!"

Supposedly it's a "plot twist" caused by Michael Caine's nihilism.

In any case, there isn't much more to say at this end.  It's said better, and funnier, by a reviewer on IMDB named ruskin-462-304151, you can find it here, it should be top of the pile.


Sunday, December 20, 2015

meme generator 101

It is beyond cavil that in the 21st Century, in the United States of America, both online and in that despised physical corporal world everyone wants so badly to escape,** you must, as a participating citizen of this great social enterprise heretofore referenced as the United States of America, stay current with whatever new idea, phrase, or 140-character utterance is considered your age-cohort-reflective version of the jr high school or high school student's idea of "popularity."

Upon such notions are great nations built.

Likewise, because in this same time period people are tired of thinking of what's straightforwardly obvious and true, self-concept must be built in the negative.  You are not this, you would never be that, how can anyone possibly think ________ is socially acceptable, etc.  In your age-cohort-reflective social colossus --that very same think tank of social media trend building into which Zuckerbergs tap for manipulation to fiscal advantage-- you will employ what you consider "humor" to further show your Good Citizen status, and this "humor" will also be cast in the negative.  You choose a masticated and pepsin-deconstructed version of irony, one so digested into constituents it shouldn't still be running under the same label.

But you have motive force, you can build trends.

You might build one based on something you saw elsewhere.  But you wouldn't credit the source, because that might make you look unoriginal, and the "ironic" display shouldn't ever match the comic construct to which it aspires.  That would have too much substantive integrity, which isn't a good fit in your nugatory world.





__________________________
**Hence the obsession with online as reality, face buried in smartphone/tablet/laptop/desktop display, more energy into twitter and facebook than in talking to neighbors and thinking about who might be playing "no cookie crumbs on my paws" when examining public spending and yes-votes by those you believed to represent your interests fairly adequately and _____________ (with progress always in mind / always conserving fiscal resources in the most prudent manner), et cetera.  Tell me I'm not correct here.

Tuesday, December 15, 2015

eye minardiss

To be honest, my poetry, when I look up from the page to see what I've written, is often too full of overt political declarations, it's what I'm best at rhythmically, propulsively, embarrassingly, I'm so much better at that than I am the object-subject-subject-object-ology of poetry I somehow came to believe was superior, poetry's aim and goal.
The reason Chalupa chose poetry, chose to feminize himself, chose the foofiest use of "style" to the exclusion of chewy content when working in wordville was, he says, to impress women. But with what? His femininity?

Perhaps he was at the time too enamored of Bobby Xgau, whose male feminism got HIM a woman artist. But I think I'd rather be alone than with a pretentious woman.  And I'd surely rather be alone than pretend to be something I'm not to gain something I don't even really want deep down inside.**

****************

"Artists."

What frauds. What hammy C-movie actors on this Stage of Life.

They remind me of everything wrong with cliques, tribalism, and condescension-by-comparison -- which also is known by the term "passive-aggressive display."

****************

Chalupa tells us he's "good at" a kind of poetry.

Hey: Chalupa: you're not.


If your poetry was anything but pretense, it could stand on its own without graph paper or watercolor gussying it up in hopes you will, thanks to the graph paper/watercolor distraction from the content itself, end up as the Fad of the Moment.

****************

Perhaps the internet should let you know what you're "good at"?

You know -- in the same way you've done for about 10 yrs now, under various handles, at others' interweb homes?

Here's what you're slightly above-average at doing, Chalupa.

-being a condescender-by-comparison, while thinking you're making witty observations about fools whose foolishness needs exposing to the wider world.

-and imitating the "artists" you think "matter."

Here's what you're really good at doing, Chalupa.

-being still 15 yrs old, still dressing like the Kool Kids dress, still talking like the Kool Kids talk, still doing whatever Kool Kids things the Kool Kids did that made them the Kool Kids in your 15 year old mariposita mind.

****************

When I emerge from this chrysalis I shall sprout beautiful wings and fly well over your head, you redneck Republican helmetball fan! screamed 15 year old Chalupa at his arch-enemy Gavin McSorley, Irish Catholic son of an auto mechanic who attracted the girls without any effort, and who was lusted after by Chalupa and the other maripositas in the PE showers, his louche dirty-fingernailed-and-obviously-hetero-ness not an obstacle to the same-sex lust of the little Ernst Rohms and James Whales and pseudo-Oscar Wildes of Chalupa's HS.

That McSorley is such a helmetball redneck!  He's the reason all the girls don't notice my immense fashion sense and invite me into their inner circle!  Always making fun of how I talk, calling me Paul Lynde, but I'm not on Hollywood Squares and I'm definitely not a square!  I'm cooler than an icicle!

****************

Naturally it was inevitable Chalupa would, in his early 40s, decide he needed to be a blogger and not only that, but a blogger who blogs as if he's a celebrity whose opinions about everything are what the world is waiting to hear.  He thought that if he let everyone know he listened to Kool Kids music and admired artfag-hero artists and "understood" the greatest most hollow pretenders in poetry and "poetry" and all other more standard formattings of "the language arts", then perhaps he really was a celebrity whose very perspiration droplets (men sweat, women perspire) are what the gen-pub clamor for and fight over and want badly to drink, bottle, or merely worship themselves.

A decade into the project, he began trumpeting his status as a Kool Kid of politics: a Donkeyphile who has had his Obamapostasy; a Donkeyphile who says he's a "leftist," a Donkeyphile who says bad things about Elephants and even worse things about those who refuse to choose a side in Donkey vs Elephant.


I've always been a Red, a Leftist.  Red in the historical sense, not in the Red State/Blue State sense.  Voted Obama.  Voted Kerry.  Voted Clinton.  Voted Dukakis.  Would have voted Carter in 1980 if a couple years older.  Red as red can be.  Blood red.  And very gauche.

And it depresses me, because I live among helmetball fans instead of football (soccer) fans, among Elephant fans instead of Donkeyphiles, among Christians instead of Atheists & Jews, and among long-form writers instead of word-artist poets.

Thus, I am the Black Dog Red.  Depressed socialist.  Surrounded by Reactionary Christer Cracker Redneck Misogynist Homophobes.

Go Bernie!

My word artistry is without parallel.  Worship me now!

*****************

Doesn't this kind of RAGESPEW, reactionary variant, enhanced subtlety sub-genre, just go so well with your herbal tea this morning, Chalupa?

Yield to the absurd hatred of the Other, Chalupa.

Just give in.


--Harold Caidagh, wondering how Chalupa manages to tell himself he's impressive.


______________________

**Chalupa wants and longs for the male sexual appendage, and by this I don't mean he's a compulsive masturbator, but instead, is a deluded XY+XY person who is in the closet because he can't let go of his Diego Maradona fantasy from 40 yrs ago and Maradona wasn't a mariposa.

Saturday, December 12, 2015

my golden handcuffs have corinthian leather padding to prevent discomfort

Maybe a decade ago, I got into an online argument.  Surprising, isn't it?  I'm not the contentious sort and typically prefer discussion to argument, but when given lemons and you're thirsty, what's a guy to do?

The argument concerned the International Moron Breeding Association, commonly pitched to the American populace as the International Mountain Biking Association.  And it concerned Ashley Korenblat, and I accused AK of yuppie perspectives and gentrification embodiment, wrapped up in the handle that back then was just beginning but as of 2015 is everywhere:  "grow the sport."

This blog's various authors, in varying states of disgust and/or disappointment regarding the way IMBA fails to look at things long-term unless it's about long-term income streams and that vaunted journalistic principle of "access," have talked about "grow the sport" before.  Simply:  if you want something to last and that something is a participant-focused thing, you will want participants who have a vested interest in the thing.  And by "vested interest" I mean, more than a passing fad's "oh MTB is cool now, I think I'll get a mtn bike," which gets ridden for a season at best and becomes a dust magnet thereafter.  Bringing such people "into the sport" doesn't help anyone but the retailers.  The retailers aren't the riders.  The riders you'd want to work with are those who have spent a long time bicycling and have seen what has happened to access for MTBs during that long time.  Someone who just started MTB thanks to an article in Outside magazine hyping carbon wonderbikes, that person doesn't know much, if anything, about what MTB riders have dealt with over the past 20 years when trying to have equal access (equal to horses and walkers) to trails within state and federal lands.

Surprise was not on the menu when I read this entry just now and saw AK's response in the comments thereafter.

Short version of AK's response:  but we need access to succeed.

It's like Marxists, who support incremental voting-in of Marxist politicians, the better to have a Marxist-dominant legislature, which eventually will create a Marxist government for the Marxist benefit of everyone.  The fact that it would take 500 years to vote-in a majority as Marxist is of no moment.  Get access, increase access, convert the system.**

The problems with AK's perspective relate to a focus on "access" and a belief that being accommodating is the key to getting Fed Govt to see things your way.  This being a product of naivete is not likely, and I would wager a sizeable sum that AK knows FedGov doesn't play fair, it expects you to play ball.

When you want FedGov to budge from an intractable regulatory/legal stance, "public participation" is going to net you nothing more than FedGov going through the motions of "receiving" your comments regarding its intractable position(s).  It has no obligation to take your comments seriously, let alone rework its intractable position to account for concerns, quarrels, and antipathies laid out in whatever comments are received.

The only way to get movement on the intractable position is litigation.  But AK thinks it's better to "come to the table" (quotes don't mean AK said this, they mean to suggest it's a cliche) and smile and nod and end up, once again, the red-headed stepchild of trail users.

Ashley Korenblat doesn't speak for me or any other MTB rider I know.  Ashley Korenblat speaks to status quo maintenance on trail access, not rocking the boat, not being a burr under FedGov's saddle.  Ashley Korenblat speaks to Ashley Korenblat's moving up the $$ ladder thanks to "access."  Ashley Korenblat doesn't care if MTB riders in MT and ID just lost a bunch of trail mileage access, because contesting that loss would reduce Ashley Korenblat's "access."



_____________________________

** See here, scroll down to the "Karl Marx" part.

Friday, December 11, 2015

don't stop, don't think


I'm not sure how many categories this fits, but for initial impressions:

1) "green jobs"
2) "clean coal"
3) "environmental economics"
4) "externalities" in regular economics
5) Ron Bailey @ The Silent T

Thursday, December 10, 2015

more canadian "humour"

Spam McWay at Ennis Emby, in the so-called "lede":
What in the name of Jeebus would possess anyone to spend the price of a new refrigerator on a pair of mountain bike wheels…
Hah hah hah. Jeebus. Hah hah hah.

Hey, but wait.  How's come it haint Yah-yah-yah-Way?

Hah hah hah.  Price of new refrigerator in the upscale cliques in which Spam McWay runs in North Los Angeles must be absurd, but necessary to keep up with the Gordons, eh Spam?

I know that if my fridge goes tango uniform, I'm spending $3,000 USD at least.  Nothing but the most expensive icebox can keep your food cold in the manner to which North Los Angeleans have become accustomed.

*************

To Spam's non-credit, he "walks it back"** by clarifying he can make a tepid joke with the best of the Barneyfans in Canada.  Here's Spammer in the full glory of his word-mega-salad:
You may be wondering what in the name of Jeebus would possess anyone to spend the price of a new top-of-the line refrigerator on a pair of mountain bike wheels, besides vanity, obsessiveness and sheer idiocy.
See, he was just kidding.  He really didn't mean that every person in Vancouver has to own and use a $3,000 USD refrigerator.

Those Canadians, they're so funny!

I'm going to go listen to Barenaked Ladies now.  Such arch satirists!


--Paul Behrer, a veritable font of disappointment here on your computer/phone/tablet display.



____________________________

** Oh yes, we know all the best refined, informed TED lecture audience member lingo. Walk it back, Spammer. Walk it back.  And "lede."  See how much we know about hipsterisms in the 21st Century North American dialect!

Wednesday, December 9, 2015

seemingly unrelated

Have you noticed that Getting Rich by Kasting a Lein is running out of sock puppet energy?  5 comments/post, all by the same hand as the author of the OP, no distinction in voices, and the sloppiness of having two different "handles" using the same exact avatar and the same exact perspective voiced.

Every post = Donkey lust barely concealed, quite like Dennis Perrin.  But at the same time as the Donkey lust continues unabated, there are whinges about how "the left" keeps "losing" to "the right."

It's like the deluded fools who plan their year around the Super Bowl and treat that game as the ultimate reference point of what is noble in humanity.  Obviously the game has to be Good vs Evil and obviously, whomever you are, your Team is the one that represents Good.

It doesn't matter that you have almost innumerable adversaries who approach the theatrical distraction as seriously as you do, but from the opposite side.  They, too, are convinced they represent what is Good.

******************

How do people go around equating "the left" with the Donkeys?

We should ask Chalupa.  He seems to be the point man on this little gambit.  You know:  Obamapostasy happens because D = the Left, but O = something sickeningly deceptive inasmuch as I assumed his half-Blackness meant Leftist and thus D = the Left remains sacrosanct as a theoretical construct thriving in my echo-laden cranium.

All this, while preening self as the Great Seer, but as usual, "self-deprecating" with such things as

My Complicity

or

CASSANDRA, CANARY, WEATHERVANE, FOOL


We're supposed to be moved to BWAAAAAAAAH HAH HAH HAH HAH doubled over in hilarity at that, but it's not moving anyone in that manner.

Instead, it's like this:

I am incredibly pathetic.  I'd like to imagine myself as the insightful one, but I'm rather sightless, as my track record demonstrates.  So maybe I'd be better off selling myself not on sociopolitical insights or human psychology & motivation revelations, but instead, a firm fast hold on my perspective at age 15 when I told myself I was not only the Pontiff of Artistic Progress in my clique, but also --in the making, that is/was-- the nascent Diego Maradona of my HS.  This I prove now, at age 55, with my inside-baseball knowledge of trivia relevant to stadium design, stadium location, criticism of a coach, criticism of a player.  I do this from the perspective of one who, at age 15, had great potential in his mind where soccer (euro football, not helmetball) was concerned.  Let's not pay heed to where all that potential went, and whether I ever fulfilled it in any amount or to any degree.  What matters is that at 15, I was brimming with potential in the Arts and in Soccer, and that's the entity I hold in mind 40 years later when I look at myself.

Cribbed from the graph-paper watercolor journal of Chalupa, Artist in Residence at Georgetown University Library Staff.


******************

The continual battle waged within minds is what we should attend to here. 

If you mistakenly believed that your chosen Hero or Savior was interested in doing things for the benefit of all --or at least all who, like you, support the Winning Team-- and then later you discover in mid-life something most intelligent people discovered around 18-25 yrs of age, it's clear what you should do.

You should blame OTHERS for how you, in your naivete that pretends at great wisdom/insight, created a false myth for your sense of belonging and identity and worth.

******************

In the case of the Rich who Kast a Lein for humint manip purposes, what you should do is complain about how today, "the Left" are not being "true Leftists" and further the ruse with an assertion insisting that when you first began "supporting" them, "the Left" were as left as left can be, so diametrically opposed to the Right that they just could not be more Left if they tried. 

What happened to them?

I know.

Reactionaries did it.


--Paul Behrer, with pity and remorse.

Saturday, December 5, 2015

Chalupa ate some catnip and now is manic


HOLYFUCK! 
INSANE RIGHTOID REACTIONARIES!
WHERE'S THE FUCKING GUN CONTROL, OBAMA?
HOLYFUCK!
 
SEATSIX, 
WE'LL GET MURDERED AT THE GAME
UNLESS OBAMA TAKES THOSE REACTIONARIES' GUNS
PLANET, 
YOU'LL DIE WHILE MAKING ART
UNLESS OBAMA TAKES THOSE REACTIONARIES' GUNS
EARTHGIRL, 
YOU'LL DIE WHILE IGNORING ME AGAIN
UNLESS OBAMA TAKES THOSE REACTIONARIES' GUNS
MY WFMU e-BUDDIES, 
YOU'LL DIE UNLESS...UNLESS...
UNLESS OBAMA TAKES THOSE REACTIONARIES' GUNS

HOLYFUCK!
THOUGHT I WAS A GENIUS, BUT
I'M JUST A LIBRARIAN
HOLYFUCK!

HOLYFUCK!
CHRISTER CRACKER REDNECKS NEED TO BE KILLED
BUT ONLY AFTER
WE DO WHAT'S NEEDED, MEANING:
OBAMA TAKES THOSE REACTIONARIES' GUNS!

HOLYFUCK!
I'LL RENEG ON MY OBAMAPOSTASY WHEN
OBAMA TAKES THOSE REACTIONARIES' GUNS!

HOLYFUCK!
EVERYTHING I HATE = REACTIONARY!

HOLYFUCK!
WHERE ARE MY ANTI-PSYCHOTIC MEDS?
HOLYFUCK!

HOLYFUCK!

HOLYFUCK!
I'M AFRAID OF MY OWN SHADOW 
IN 
MEATSPACE, 
BUT
ONLINE I CAN KICK ANYONE'S ASS, AND
ESPECIALLY A FUCKING
REACTIONARY POSING AS 
A NEO-LIBERAL WHO
IS JUST A REACTIONARY WHO
VOTED FOR RON PAUL AND
IDENTIFIES AS TEA PARTY AND
THUS REQUIRING
IMMEDIATE EXTERMINATION 
DONE BY
ME!

HOLYFUCK!

I HATE BEING INVISIBLE!

HOLYFUCK! 

HOLYFUCK!
I'LL ADD THE WATERCOLOR
LATER 
TO PROVE
I'M AN ARTIST TOO
EVEN THOUGH
A TRISOMY 21
CHILD OF TWO
CAN DO BETTER ART
THAN ME

HOLYFUCK!

fucking mike fucking stool-eating levy

Mike Levy wants you to think that Congress giving money for "bike paths" is good.

Apparently Mike doesn't think MOUNTAIN bikes need anywhere to ride that isn't paved. Mike, and D8 (RC) and Dumbo Kazimer, all they care about is fucking click farming. And they do it by pretending they give two flying fucks and 3 floating blowjobs about "mountain biking."

Apparently, they only care about e-riding, because they're happy to see hyper-expensive urban "bike lanes" and even happier to see singletrack lost to doublewide "flow" and total loss of trail access in, y'know, the MOUNTAINS.

But urban bike paths from the Congress, that's what two doofus Canucks (Leeeeeeveeeee and Kazzy Murr) and a moron Murken (Are See Dee Eight) think is best for those of us who've lost our trails.

"It's okay, people in the Bitterroot NF, Lolo NF, Boulder-White Clouds, Sawtooths, etc. People in Santa Clara CA are getting new asphalt with fancy paint on it."

Fuck you, Greedy Mike.

Just go fuck yourself.

You can't even admit to yourself that you don't know govt policy, govt planning, land mgt, urban planning, budget apportionment, forest management, trails access, or anything but click farming, can you?

You just work as a porn movie set fluffer.

Nice work.


--Harold Caidagh, thumbing his nose at GRH, Judge Flappe and anyone else who thinks he should shut up

Friday, December 4, 2015

two glass eyes

Attaboy, Matty:

Donate to Reason! Because We Believe in Due Process Even/Especially When the World Goes Mad

Yes, that's why Veronica de-Reggie'd just glosses over 4th and 5th A concerns in this recent essay.

(off-screen/off-stage Matt Welch: "Dude, you just don't get the irony at the core of my journalistic comedy.")

Wednesday, December 2, 2015

oh canada!

Given the chance, a resident of British Columbia will be pleased to inform you on how progressive things are in the left-most province of Canada.  Everyone's polite, everyone's positive, and by golly the living standards are shooting through the roof of this incredible skyscraper!  It's green, it's developing rapidly, and there is naught but social progress on the horizon as far as the eye can see.

Canadians from BC also are rapid in their denunciation of their sub-border neighbors in America.  Whatever bad happens in BC, it's almost always Americans to blame.  A domestic BC issue that comes out on the regressive, reactionary side of the ideal social equation, that's due to American Lawyers working their evil witchery and forcing Canadian lawyers to behave like the dastardly American ones.  If things are topsy-turvy in British Columbia ministrations of justice, that's because of Americans.

Naturally I am fully willing to accept blame for this recent decision of the BC Supreme Court.  As an American lawyer working in the state of Neuwestia, I can assure you that I lobbied hard here on the internet (though I did not tweet about it, twitter still being well beyond my technocapacities) for a way to use judicial power to sanctify hawkish paramilitary protection of mining assests in Guatemala.