Saturday, August 15, 2015

yoo can doo eeeeeet, yoo can doo eeeeeet OHL-NYTE-LOOOOOOOOOOOOOONG

I don't know why I didn't see this before -- but probably it's because The New Republic is something I laugh at. The general premise is good, though it's something I have long believed to be obvious, while constantly scratching my head and furrowing my brow when I discover it's obvious pretty much only to me. And, now, I can assume this Deresciewicz character maybe even believes that he sees it too -- and sees it honestly, rather than as something he can sell as a marketable contrarian stance.

The land of the Ancient Papyrus is gill-stuffed with summa-summa-summa-cum-laude CVs/resumes indicating All-American status in a sport and managing a multi-million dollar business operation of some nebulous type since age 12. If you judged them by these stupid pieces of e-paper called CV or resume, you'd think them to a person qualified to be Emperor of the Galaxy.  If not God.

Meanwhile these people showed, also to a person, a general disinclination to demonstrate intellectual creativity. If the solution you need happens to be residing within their prodigious warehouse of memorized info-bits and concepts, they will snap to a solution of sorts. The solution might be one you couldn't think of yourself because, unfortunately, you were born with only average intellectual talents. You can't memorize as many things as the Future Emperor of the Galaxy, and you never put as much work into learning.

It's common in my experience to find one of these FEG types can't do much mendelian breeding of the various tidbits and concepts they hold in their prodigious warehouse of eidetically impressive brain tissue. So if your answer requires much open-concept thinking and cross-wiring of traditionally boxed-and-separated "fields" (as academia breaks them down), you generally won't get that answer from FEG.

Though, ironically, the audience would believe that FEG can't possibly be so deficient.

Look at that CV!

The Type A+++ that is the FEG, s/he is just the adult world's version of what, starting in about 5th grade, I saw childhood peers demonstrating as a collection of humanoids gathered for a social purpose. Tribalism and insecurity, and the general desire to be led, rather than thinking you might be able to lead yourself.  People want a well-credentialed leader, and in 5th grade lingo, someone who's "popular" because of symbols and tokens and gestures presented to their fawning subjects.  Prom Queen, HS QB, President of Student Council, First Chair Violin in school orchestra.

Pretending to be able to lead yourself often results in a pose at contrarianism. The pose ruse is revealed by having a soft contrarianism, nerf criticism might be a good name for it. Criticism is monetized differently now in the era of the monetized concept. The concept doesn't have to be reduced to implementation in 2015, it's marketable and monetizable if it can generate clicks or divert attention.

If that Deresciewicz guy can bring a little more heat with a bit more precision, I might believe he believes what he says.

Thursday, August 13, 2015

we're libertarians, but we don't care about liberty

Over at (t)reason.com, the mental midgets who write for that pile o' turds continue to assure the pile's readers that things are peachy-keen.

Federal Agencies Fight for Warrantless Access to Emails

I don't know how/why a person named Veronique deRugy is assigned the task of writing reveal 85% of the truth but conceal the disturbing 15% that we shouldn't tell anyone, and I don't know why her pen name is some kind of The Archies reference,** but I do know Ms de-Reggie'd-long-before-Betty-did can't bring herself to speak honestly on the topic.

***************

Actually, I do know why.

It's because (t)reason.com has made heroes of Glenn Greenwald and Edward Snowden, and (t)reason.com can't be bothered to recall exactly what it was that Mark Klein revealed in 2006.

Presumably that's because homo-/metro- sexuality is one of the bullet/focal points of the (t)reason.com perspective, and Mark Klein's 06 revelations didn't involve a gay lawyer or a metro B-movie actor. What they did involve was the disclosure that telecom companies were openly eavesdropping on all signals they handled -- without a warrant, and without notifying any warrant-issuing entity that they deserved a pass on warrant-before-eavesdropping due to some legitimate exigency or at least a cobbled-together salad of words pretending to argue in favor of such a "national security" emergency attending the eavesdropping activity.

***************

This, good cretinous reader of this tumbleweed-infested Home of Homophobic Misogynistic Reactionary Mirth, is precisely why Greenwald was made into a hero and his Tom Cruise-wannabe disinfo vector Snowden was primped and pimped as a "whistleblower".

"What's that, Ochstradt? What's the reason?"

Glad you asked. It's because the lie offered by Greenwald/Snowden would be unmade and rendered impotent if the originator of the truth (Klein's 06 saga) had been upheld as the True Revelator and the disclosures therein given broader exposure.  Because you know, stupid knuckledragging Progressive pals-o-mine, that there was near-to-nil coverage in 06 or any time thereafter of Mark Klein's revelations. 

You know that YOU didn't read or hear about it, not back then and not since then either, and you definitely know that you don't believe me when I talk about this stuff, because Karl Franz Ochstradt is not a BRAND NAME EXPERT on any subject while Glenn Greenwald and Edward Snowden are, in your fantasy-masquerading-as-reality, the real EXPERTS on cyberspookery.  They ARE your experts because you heard about them time and time again from sources you trust, and you trust those sources because they have spent lots of time writing and/or speaking in tongues familiar to your 4-Square Pentecostal belief in Progress. 

All an infotainer has to do, in order to gull your incredibly cretinous self, is speak in Progressive tongues.  Use Progressive buzzwords.  Use Progressive button-pushing triggering phrases.  And demonize the right monsters.

Do that, and watch the Progressives fall in line as zombie walkers in a somnambulent queue.

********************

"But Ochstradt, you started out talking about the people at reason.com, and here you've been pot-shotting at Progressives.  Did you get confused?  Lose focus?  Or simply have a synaptic misfire typical of someone who has the same mental illnesses you have?"

Ah.  Yes.  There it is.  The allegation battery, the accusation barrage, done by passive-aggression, emulating Richard Perle and Paul Wolfowitz.

Let me tell you, good Progressive, that there isn't a wooden nickel's difference between Progressives and "libertarians" (followers of and participants at reason.com) where skull-crushing naivete and soul-stealing groupthink are concerned.  Both tribes think themselves smart-as-fuck, both groups "prove" this by mocking the other with derisive words and scornful tones, and yet both gangs work from a fantasy playbook that doesn't really have much to say for itself in the way of reality-based foundations.

Both groups think Greenwald is a constitutional law expert and cybersecurity genius, and both groups think Snowden is a real whistleblower who left BA&H employ with a whole mess o' damaging data that eventually -- maybe some time in the latter part of the 21st Century, if we're lucky -- will be revealed.

Neither group, as a group, puts any value in the opposite position.  Neither would believe that Greenwald actually knows little-to-nothing about Constitutional Law, and neither can imagine that Greenwald lies when he says he knows cybersecurity, and neither would ever entertain the concept of Snowden being an actor playing a role on the Bread&Circus circuit in service of distractive disinformation ends.

As far as both gangs are concerned, the Snowden/Greenwald Team is bringing cold hard truths home to liberty-concerned Americans, no matter whether Progressive or Libertarian, whether Republican or Democrat, whether technophilic futurist or luddite reactionary.

*******************

Perhaps Veronica will dump Reggie and Archie alike and end up married to Jughead. 

Yes, and maybe Progressives and "libertarians" will dump the bullshit Greenwald/Snowden story in favor of what Mark Klein tried to inform people about in 2006. 

If that happens, then Ms deRugy's linked essay will be nullified as missing the main point while trying to argue about a peripheral minor pseudo-point.



--Karl Franz Ochstradt, sworn enemy of tribalist reality-deniers and ignorant smugitarians.


__________________________

**  Is that Modern Hipster hilarity?  An "ironic" reference to a late 1960s - early 1970s cartoon and/or novelty band?

subjective satire -- or at least, satire-wannabe

A group of multicultural, international aspirants to satire gathered recently with a focus on trying to satirize Donald Trump's placement in the 2016 POTUS race.  We had a stealth reporter there to capture the workings of this august congress and its work products.

Faithful Democrat:  OMIGOD, he's a REPTHUGLICAN!  Wants you to STARVE!  Then DIE!  He will bring ANARCHY!  (carted out of room by EMTs, who suspect cerebrovascular event despite patient's age of 24 yrs old)

GOP Republican:  Not a serious contender, no foreign policy experience.  Just like Hillary.  (grins a Mona Lisa smile, thumps briefcase in a ba-dum-BUMP manner)

Progressive Democrat:  His hair is SCANDALOUS!  Plus he started on third base and believed he HIT A TRIPLE!  MISOGYNIST too!  Doesn't believe in CAMPUS RAPE EPIDEMIC!  Stupider than SARAH PALIN!  Has BINDERS full of women like MITT ROMNEY!  Plus a total HOMOPHOBE!  (struts about with triumphant smug bearing somewhat like that of Pajama Boy)

Japanese PoliSci Student @ George Washington University:  (submission is cartoon of Herbie but with doe eyes, saying You're Feye-ed!)

Socialist Workers Party representative:  Anyone that rich is a thief, unless he's Noam Chomsky.  Hah hah.  Get it?  Get it?  Get it now?  How about now?  Still don't get it?  You must be a reactionary fascist!  Hah hah hah hah!  (waves copy of Manufacturing Consent, occasionally opening to fly leaf with alleged Chomsky autograph)

Green Party campaign manager for Jill Stein MD:  All those riches and he doesn't even like tofu, and his limousine isn't an alt-fuel vehicle!  Never eaten quinoa!  Doesn't even approve of wind power!  Jealous of Elon Musk!  (constantly air-thrusting  Blackphone 2 prototype opened to webpage for Tesla, demanding that cameraman get it on video)

Canadian student majoring in Post-Homophobic Economics @ University of British Columbia:  Reminds me of Rob Ford without the waistline (snickers like a 9 year old girl who just heard her friend say "Darren has cooties!")

Faux-Libertarian regular commenter at reason.com:  Wood chipper for Trump!  Wants to destroy free markets by cornering them and keeping everything for himself!  (sits back and waits for congratulatory-seeming dull-witted parrot comments by other forum regulars)


Wednesday, August 12, 2015

new Chamber of Commerce tourism video for Missoula

The Missoula Chamber of Commerce, in conjunction with the Good Food Store, produced this video to promote the wonderful lifestyle available to those who live in Missoula.  Move now and experience this gratifying assurance of your noble Progressive culture!

Tuesday, August 11, 2015

emscot p. EK

pee
pull
love
the
lye

Maybe if you don't like using words and letters like Plastalina, you won't understand what was just written.

**************

I could try to tell you that I'm talking about mascots, and record producer Phil Ek, and the way urinary catheters pull your urine out of your bladder so you don't have to get out of the hospital bed and try to hobble over to the toilet to empty your pee into its bowl, and how lye is a powerful substance historically used when doing industrial bathroom cleaning.

But that would be a lie.

It would be a lie in service of a blog entry.  Sort of like this:



On the bar TV above H's head a cop picked up a Ferguson protester and threw him to the ground like a wet stuffed animal, and the bar exploded in laughter, some fuck started chanting USA! USA! USA! and the rest of the bar joined in....

**************

Some people need to make up lies like that one, so they can keep being angry at anything that doesn't mirror their own views/beliefs. They try to put the origin of their own pathetic stuck-at-age-15-with-all-the-nascent-independence-it-carries-and-certainly-the-cocksure-eternal-rectitude-of-self viewpoint somewhere outside themselves, preferably stamp it onto redneck parents or redneck christer grandparents who lived in a redneck christer dirt-eater town in redneck christer dirt-eater central/western Pee Eh, and just keep spewing hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate mixed with self-righteousness self-righteousness self-righteousness self-righteousness blended with solipsism solipsism solipsism solipsism and a smattering of perseveration perseveration perseveration perseveration.

But I'm a writer and I like to write fiction!

I'm sure you do.  The question is, why do you suck at it -- and not just suck, but suck really badly and powerfully, like a two dollar hoooer who can pull a golf ball through a garden hose?

***************


I'll settle down when every man, woman and child is a progressive like me.

Yeah.  Keep telling yourself that.  Everyone a pretentious, hyper-judgmental, yet ironically (and not hipster irony either!) robotic regurgitator of the Avowed and Acknowledged (through groupthink) Experts' views on what is permissible and lovable in music, books, movies and generally speaking, life. 

I knew people like the Ding-Dong in HS and college.  They were eager to tell me how much they knew about music, books, movies -- and they did so by repeating the viewpoints of the hipster critics of the era.  Movie ABC was whatever Hipster Critic said about it.  Album JKL was exactly as Hipster Critic said, and the band who made it -- DEF & the GHs -- were re-imagining music for all the most refined sets of ears.  Novelist OPQ certainly was the only one worth reading, the only one who mattered

Because Hipster Critic said so.

And Refined Proto-Hipster Peer had memorized the say-so, so it was gospel.

****************

If you want to know why your pretense at "art" sucks donkey danglers, it's right here:  you don't know how to originate, because your view is enwrapped by Parrotting Others and Emulating Experts.  You know you are sub-normal in creative power, but you want terribly to produce art, and produce art that matters.

But you know you never will.

So you rage, seethe, fume at the world wherever it resembles anything unlike your imagined Valhalla.

And you passive-aggressively blame these christer-cracker-redneck-reactionaries for the unsettled nature of your ego/identity, your mental dis-ease.

I find it funny, but not because you're a gifted purveyor of satire.  Oh no, it isn't that.

It's because you're not that, but you imagine you are that.

That's one ripe huckleberry, Chalupa.

Friday, August 7, 2015

the MICHAEL sees all, knows all, tells all

John MICHAEL Greer, Supreme Arch-Druid of the North American Land Mass and possibly of Pangaea, submits the following wisdom among his other coprolitic gifts for posterity:

Dave, the fascinating thing to me is that nobody in the banking industry has stopped to think about what happens when their parasitic behavior kills its host.

Do you ever wonder why this post was green-lit back in May? Here is a good example.

The MICHAEL wants you to think "nobody" in the "banking industry" ever would "stop to think about" how their "parasitic behavior" will inevitably (per the wise scryings of the MICHAEL, that is) kill "its host."

The MICHAEL doesn't know anything about the "banking industry" if he thinks nobody ever looks down the road.  Financial businesses are in the habit of looking down the road and putting into action a present course which will, once traveled down that same road, yield profits.  That's what they do.  It's what they've always done.  That's what banking, insurance, lending, levering, multiplying, liquifying and otherwise monetarily or numerically manipulating present $$ is all about.

Of course, when your idea of "progress" is steam-punk-blessed retro-agrarianism (what the MICHAEL pines for, if his published prolixity is any indication), you probably don't have time for figuring out how or why something you'd off-handedly lump whole as the "banking industry" would ever look at "what happens" when a present path is taken to a future point.

I guess the MICHAEL thinks the assessment of interest on loaned money is all about living in the past?  Or in the present?

And the reason loans are repaid over time with accumulated interest, that's a happy accident of a failure to plan for the future?

Naturally, the MICHAEL thinks only the "banking industry" is "parasitic," and anyone who wants the rest of humanity to go steam-punk-approved-retro-agrarian is not a "parasite" who depends on others seeing things his way, eh?

How is the "banking industry" going to "kill its host" through following some present path, that's what I'd like the MICHAEL to explain.  Of course, he won't explain that.  He can't.  And mostly because he doesn't know how, because he doesn't understand anything other than looking backward to the 1700s for most everything aside from his internetting, which requires 20th if not 21st Century enabling.

Can you imagine what kind of "following" the MICHAEL would have if he'd been left with a Gutenberg machine and forced to arrange and publish his own pamphlets to hand out to random passers-by?

"Good kind sir, would you take a reasoned gander at my weekly missive, into which I've put moments if not actual minutes of forethought?"

"Get that trash out of my face, you smelly bum.  I already have toilet paper enough adjacent to my commode."

Perhaps that's not how it would have gone.  Maybe it would go like this:

"Dear sweet madam, kindly peruse my arduously researched and painstakingly published prognostications regarding the future of our noble society.  I offer this to you freely, without expectation."

"Well aren't you full of yourself?  Why don't you do something productive, like grow sugar beets or corn for the community?"

"All excellent ideas, madam, if it were not for my lack of a green thumb and my inability to live in the present rather than dwelling on the past."

"Sir, I would much rather enter Madam Zorah's Palm Reading Emporium and give her my hard-earned coins for a useless foretelling of the future.  Please find someone else to harangue with your feeblemindedness.  Now if you wouldn't mind, I've got to go butcher a chicken for supper."

*******************

Despite a remarkable naivete and paper-thin depth of understanding of the world's and America's social workings, our good soothsayer the MICHAEL offers this point of sagacity elsewhere in the same discussion:

Max, I expect a domestic insurgency in the US, a la Iraq or Syria, which will cripple the US economy and make it impossible for the national goverment to exert power anywhere outside its borders. We're very close to that right now, especially in the deep South and mountain West.

Naturally from the vantage point of Cumberland MD, our benevolent dictator-in-waiting known as the MICHAEL is fully and well versed in the social happenings of "the deep South" and of the "mountain West." Naturally.

All reality as it unfolds on Earth is visible with tremendous acuity in Cumberland MD -- if you see all, know all, tell all as does the MICHAEL.

Once upon a time, the MICHAEL tried to lecture one of this blog's past authors on how life is where that author lives (NB: in the mountain West), despite the MICHAEL's not living there. Of course, this doesn't surprise me now, as his schtick is omniscience informing a largesse of coping strategies offered to the desperate. In the present, the MICHAEL tells us that he fears the "deep South" and the "mountain West" -- and as the MICHAEL has tried to explain to prior authors at this blog, it's because of "reactionaries" who cling to a religion other than Druidism.

All religions aside from Druidism are disturbing indicators of psychopathy, you see.  And Druidism?  It's the foremost sign of advanced intelligence.  That's why the MICHAEL writes poorly-drawn and hollowly-crafted science fiction, because Druidism suggests the best way to get people back to the earth (steampunk-infused-retro-agrarianism) is to expose them to lousy sci-fi read only by social cripples.

*********************

Someone once tried to persuade me that John MICHAEL Greer is a fabricated internet construct, created only to be a satire of socio-econo-political wrangling, and designed to grant a microscopic income stream resulting from passive-aggressive marketing of his tepid, dull-witted sci fi writings.

I suppose that's possible.  I think it far more likely that he's a wealthy man who doesn't have to work because he made a lot of money doing something like writing basic code for a software program that enjoyed a few years of commercial success in the early days of personal computing.  Only a social outcast and interpersonal quadriplegic could believe the things that the MICHAEL offers as "wisdom" at the arch-druid report.  And only someone with even less skill and even fewer connections to his fellow human could find that report to be satirically innovative, or comically endowed with any laughter provocation or chuckle instigation.

What do you think his annual income is, brought in through his report and attributable to his cretinous sci fi writings?  Six thousand?  Three thousand?

And we're supposed to believe that he lives successfully steampunk-retro on that pittance, without a period of gargantuan profit in his youth, and/or without a financial backer to support his distractive diatribes?

Perhaps there is some comedy on offer, but I doubt very highly that it's satirical or even parodic in character.

Mrs John MICHAEL Greer prepares the scrying ball for His Lordship's prognostication

Tuesday, August 4, 2015

floppy wrists, insecure egos, subnormal IQs

Now that mountain bikes have become MAINSTREAM, BRO! we have all sorts of idiot fads and gay/metro slavery to those fads' fashions. Queer Eye for the Straight Guy couldn't have done a better job of pushing useless faggotry onto insecure boys-playing-at-men-but-unsure-how-to-be-men.

I bring you to Ennis Emby.

Better Bailout Options for 1x Systems?



So which is the better option (if needed):
  • a smaller narrow wide chainring, 32 -> 30T, 30 -> 28T ( and/or going Oval?)
  • adding a pie plate extender on to your cassette, 36 -> 40T, 40 ->42T, 42 ->44 or 45T
I'm seeing every combination out there, just wondering what is working best for people?

Poofty removed his front derailleur, front shifter and little ring to show his enslavement to fashion.  But now he can't pedal his bike up a hill.

Wouldn't it have been easier to just reinstall the front der, shifter, granny ring?

Naaaah.  That would make poofty feel like a femme, and he wants to feel butch.

So what does femme poofty do to "feel butch"?  He does a Larry Craig.  He goes to the airport bathroom and politely waits for another poofty femme who needs to "feel butch" to get into the neighboring stall, then he arranges a quick closeted faggot fuck with the neighbor.

Then leaves the bathroom feeling just as butch as he imagines himself.

It's a lot like that.

What kinds of responses did poofty get to his appeal for the brethren's wisdom?

Here's a killer.

Whether you go 30t or 32t and 40t or 42t if you live anywhere with nasty climbs I like to run a granny ring inside (must space over if running a 30t/104) for a manual bailout. 
You may rarely use it, but you'll never notice the extra weight of an alloy granny and four bolts, and it can be a life saver on that second (or 3rd) lap of the Flank (etc). The few seconds to change between rings isn't slowing you down any as you were going to take a quick break at the top anyways.

Remind me, you floppy-wristed poofter, why exactly you went to the He-Man 1x__ anyway.

To save weight? Well, do you really think that having a front derailleur and front der shifter is the reason your bike is so "heavy" and tough for you to pedal? You think climbing hills poorly is due to the weight of front der, shifter, cabling, and granny gear... and yet you suggest this?

I tell you, stupid chimpanzee reader of this knuckledragging reactionary misogynist bigot authored blog, that you're just a mincing wrist-flopping faggot if you ditch your 2x or 3x just to follow fashion and feel butch, only to learn that you're far too femme to make the 1x__ work. Just come out of the closet and admit it, you're not a bike rider, not a mountain bike rider, not a man, not even a teenage boy on the brink of manhood.

You're a tiny little girl in an adult XY chromosome body.

Maybe it's time to consider gender reassignment.