Tuesday, August 4, 2015

floppy wrists, insecure egos, subnormal IQs

Now that mountain bikes have become MAINSTREAM, BRO! we have all sorts of idiot fads and gay/metro slavery to those fads' fashions. Queer Eye for the Straight Guy couldn't have done a better job of pushing useless faggotry onto insecure boys-playing-at-men-but-unsure-how-to-be-men.

I bring you to Ennis Emby.

Better Bailout Options for 1x Systems?

So which is the better option (if needed):
  • a smaller narrow wide chainring, 32 -> 30T, 30 -> 28T ( and/or going Oval?)
  • adding a pie plate extender on to your cassette, 36 -> 40T, 40 ->42T, 42 ->44 or 45T
I'm seeing every combination out there, just wondering what is working best for people?

Poofty removed his front derailleur, front shifter and little ring to show his enslavement to fashion.  But now he can't pedal his bike up a hill.

Wouldn't it have been easier to just reinstall the front der, shifter, granny ring?

Naaaah.  That would make poofty feel like a femme, and he wants to feel butch.

So what does femme poofty do to "feel butch"?  He does a Larry Craig.  He goes to the airport bathroom and politely waits for another poofty femme who needs to "feel butch" to get into the neighboring stall, then he arranges a quick closeted faggot fuck with the neighbor.

Then leaves the bathroom feeling just as butch as he imagines himself.

It's a lot like that.

What kinds of responses did poofty get to his appeal for the brethren's wisdom?

Here's a killer.

Whether you go 30t or 32t and 40t or 42t if you live anywhere with nasty climbs I like to run a granny ring inside (must space over if running a 30t/104) for a manual bailout. 
You may rarely use it, but you'll never notice the extra weight of an alloy granny and four bolts, and it can be a life saver on that second (or 3rd) lap of the Flank (etc). The few seconds to change between rings isn't slowing you down any as you were going to take a quick break at the top anyways.

Remind me, you floppy-wristed poofter, why exactly you went to the He-Man 1x__ anyway.

To save weight? Well, do you really think that having a front derailleur and front der shifter is the reason your bike is so "heavy" and tough for you to pedal? You think climbing hills poorly is due to the weight of front der, shifter, cabling, and granny gear... and yet you suggest this?

I tell you, stupid chimpanzee reader of this knuckledragging reactionary misogynist bigot authored blog, that you're just a mincing wrist-flopping faggot if you ditch your 2x or 3x just to follow fashion and feel butch, only to learn that you're far too femme to make the 1x__ work. Just come out of the closet and admit it, you're not a bike rider, not a mountain bike rider, not a man, not even a teenage boy on the brink of manhood.

You're a tiny little girl in an adult XY chromosome body.

Maybe it's time to consider gender reassignment.


H.M. Lohmann said...

Mr Redweld, that reads more like something from Caidagh or Ochstradt. No hint of politesse, no reservation of judgment. This is your work?

Chet Redweld said...

Hy, it was submitted to the Ready queue this AM when I logged on. Maybe it was submitted by someone at Salon or The Intercept? Maybe it was submitted by Matt Taibbi?