Wednesday, June 25, 2014

alex p. keaton says "deregulate and explore outer space...and...um...legalize weed"

1984:

"David Stockman is THE MAN!"


2014:

"When I'm not reading/commenting at reason, I'm diversifying my portfolio."

You're not less obnoxious and not less obviously a greedy asshole just because you ditched the GOP and traded in the Gordon Gekko for the bacefook Trends Director urban woodsman pseudo-slacker costume.

I understand the urge to separate yourself from the other hipsters, the ones who think they're the vanguard of taste/style culture** while you're the vanguard of the business/consumerism culture.  They're obnoxiously PC and it doesn't take much time in their presence to start dry-heaving.  But why did you run back to the ethics/outlook of Bud Fox's mentor as your identity flagstone?

From where I sit, both of you hipster subcategories are sad, narrow-view tribalists with plenty of hubris in your public stances.  And no, your lame attempts to be bipartisan on pretending at owning irony, while practicing something which isn't that but which you call that anyway in your (as said) hubristic self-certainty -- they don't give you a pass on being obnoxious.  You're not parodying yourselves in a way that's like a knowing wink guaranteed to earn a back atcha

This grasp you fail to have on humor probably corresponds directly with your long-term social outlook.  In your view, "long-term" is 90-120 days.  Build a bubble as an Entrepreneur of the Ether.  Use modern psychological warfare (in your lingo, marketing) to convince people they can't live without this idea or thing you've imagined is profitable if only you can move X units.  If you can make money on it, that's the test of your greatness and the greatness of your idea/thing.  Utility is measured only in terms of whether you can get it to market long enough to move X units. 

It's no wonder your "humor" isn't funny and isn't even sufficiently dark, cynical or sharp enough to qualify as a knuckle-dragging pre-understudy version of irony.  Everything in your world is like the adult life of the mayfly.

If only your adult life matched its, though.  In duration, I mean.


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** Known, variously, as progressives or leftists or social-justice-minded-Democrats.  Don't let the different labels fool you, they're all the same:  Daddy State will protect us because Daddy State is staffed with Good People Like Me Who Went To Good Schools and Who Have Noble Intentions.

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