universal non-stick formula: true the sickened din

Saturday, January 19, 2013

true the sickened din

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Famous Quotes

There's really nothing wrong with a culture that cares only about profit and really doesn't give a flying fuck about what is destroyed on the way to making that glorious profit, and I don't know why anyone would ever criticize it.

--Paul Behrer, 15 April 2013

The world spins on an axis, right? So what's the axis? It's not mechanical. There isn't a physical axle running North Pole to South Pole. No, the axis is absurdity. And you know what shows this? Your belief that you can know someone else's mind and plumb someone else's heart simply by reading a post on the internet.

--Paul Behrer, 6 May 2013

Retired Jerseys

Paul Behrer - Apolitical satirist who enjoys writing satirical observations that confuse readers who cannot understand comedy unless it is not only partisan, but done in favor of their chosen tribe. Quit writing when too many readers were stopping by to read his satire. He did not seek fame nor fortune, and was not trying to "build a community." In other words, he felt claustrophobic among the many visitors, and had to leave for less crowded spaces.

Anne O'Dyan - Radical feminist leftist whose primary point of radicalism involves rejection of victim status and rejection of reductio ad absurdum man-blaming. Left quietly in the middle of the night with a brief note that said, "sanity is elsewhere; goodbye". We're not sure whether we miss her.

Hyman Mittleman Lohmann - Sensitive culturally Jewish progressive guy who went to public K-12 but private elite small and WASPy college, works for his local public television station. Departed after somewhat paranoiacally detecting "reactionary" overtones from the editorial staff, but still well-liked by the editors because they realize he's just being paranoid, probably because of some trauma he can't discuss.

Karl Franz Ochstradt - Nihilistic guy with a strange optimistic bent to his sarcastic and satirical sense of humor. Left because he just plain got tired of how stagnant everyone's thinking is, especially those who consider themselves intellectual, and/or "progressive." And who can blame him?

Charles F. Oxtrot - The Magister of Mendacious Mirth himself, hated by leftists, rightists, misogynists, misanders, feminists, lesbians, gays, bis, trannys, liberals, progressives, Marxists, Republicans, conservatives, neocons, neolibs, socialists, agorists, futurists, optimists, scientism-ists, pseudo-skeptics, statists, libertarians, Chomskyites, Zionists, kibbutzers, armchair athletes, people who think knowing sports statistics is an impressive feat, road bicyclists, nordic skiers, mountain lifestylers, country clubbers, trust funders, hipsters, Green Economy boosters, NPR fans, PBS fans, public school fans, Will Ferrell fans, Fred Armisen fans, Democrats, people in each coast's Portland, golfers, card players, gamblers, SUV owners, spineless wussies and other pathetic characters on the human stage. He left the writer's position to assume the editor's job, but only lasted 3 days as editor before getting on his bicycle and pedaling away for an un-announced length of time. Still drops by occasionally via deus ex machina.

universal non-stick formula

Saturday, January 19, 2013

true the sickened din

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